Psychologist & Patient

So, I have to write this paper. Not a "Paper" as in research and stuff like that, but a dialog between a psychologist and his patient about time management. Seriously? I get to play the psychologist? I wanna wear a cool suit coat while I do it, is that alright? Can I also imagine a couch for my patient to sit upon? Because in the movies, all psychologist have one of those funny chaise lounges, right? And, remember when they used to always show the patient getting hypnotized and stuff? Wait, maybe that was just in the movie "Sybl"? (oh, and doesn't the mention of THAT movie bring back horrible images????) Anyway, I put off writing this thing till the last possible minute. Bet it will make my instructor wonder if I was paying attention to our classroom discussion about "Time management skills".

I really wanted this dialog thingy to be a little bit funny. I mean, can you imagine being the instructor and having to read through all these things, when...(insert sound-byte of angels singing) she comes to my paper! So, I asked The Bloggess if she would like to be my patient and help me with the patient end of the dialog, since I'm pretty sure she might have had experience in that department. Unfortunately I don't think she was interested, and really my last few posts have shown absolutely no humor at all (not counting the one that links back to her blog!) so she'd have to dig a bit to find anything here that would make her think she'd want to write something with me. Besides, she's a paid blogger, and I'm "just a blogger", so...well....you know.

Anyway, I wrote the thing, and it is SO BORING! Like you can totally see some boring old stuffy psychologist in his dark office, with all heavy velvet curtains closed, and dark wood paneling on the walls, checking his watch every 30 seconds to see if, by some miracle, this boring woman is going to get out of his office already!!!! I am always good at finding the humor in any situation, and yet, I couldn't find it in this dialog. Oh wait, it's FAKE! I forgot that I made it UP! It is not REAL! When Angela starts talking about "I have a soccer tournament tonight!" I have to remind her, "Angela, you don't play soccer. What you're talking about is 'pretend', but right now we're talking about going to school, FOR REAL!" And then she's all like, "Mom, It IS REAL!" while tapping her head as if to say it's all up there in her brain, so it must be real.

But my psychologist and patient are NOT real. They are PRETEND, just like Angela's soccer tournament.

So my psychologist is supposed to help the patient come up with ways to solve some of her time management problems where balancing school, family life, and work are involved. Lets just say the husband in my make believe family was not doing ANYTHING around the house, and between work and school the wife was actually gone from the home more than he was, only they didn't realize it. So, since I have an emotionally stable fictional family, and the husband could win "Father of the Year" award for his willingness to help out of his wife would just ask, the psychologist in me was able to get everything all worked out!

I am DA BOMB of a psychologist!