How to Confuse Your Kid

Everyone knows the world revolves around time, and that time is governed by the t.v. schedule. If you didn't know that, you may have been hiding under a rock.

Angela mostly watches the Disney channel, and can tell you the line up every day from 3:15 p.m. until 9:00 p.m. (and no, she doesn't watch t.v. all that time, she just knows the schedule because they constantly put reminders on as to what's going to be on when. They do this for all the kids who have OCD who need to know these things, and Angela might be one of them. ) But Angela also has two grown-up shows she watches: The Middle, and Modern Family, and they happen to be on Wednesday nights. They're on back to back thankfully, so the second one marks bedtime.. and an end to the incessant talking. 

Every Monday morning, Angela and I have the following conversation, or some version of it:

A: Today is Monday.
M: Yep, it's Monday.
A: (counting on her fingers.) Tuesday...Wednesday...Two more days is Wednesday.
M: You're right, two more days until Wednesday.
A: The Middle and Modern Family are on Wednesday. I love Wednesday. (clapping her hands with glee)

This conversation might be repeated 382 times until the first show comes on.

I don't watch much T.V. because all my spare time is sucked up, and uselessly wasted online but I do have a couple shows I enjoy: Desperate Housewives, Brothers and Sisters, The Middle and Modern Family. see, we do spend time together!  While I was on my trip, Dean (aka Mr. Wonderful but one of my bloggy friends already stole that nickname) was nice enough to put my shows on the DVR.

This morning Angela was sitting at the dining room table, using my computer to watch the same 180 Youtube videos she always watches. Dean was making the first of our 900 Home Depot runs for the summer, so I decided it was a good time to watch some of my recorded shows. I found the first episode of "The Middle" that I'd missed, and hunkered down with my blanket to watch.

As soon as the intro music started, Angela paused her video.

A: What days it? Is today Wednesday?
M: No, it's Saturday. Can you turn your volume down a little bit?
A: It's Wednesday.
M: (confused, because Angela never mixes up the days.) No, it's Saturday. That's why you're sitting there watching Youtube videos and not at school.
A: No, it's Wednesday. The Middle is on, that means Wednesday.

She'll be messed up all day now. Remember years ago when the t.v. people who make up the schedule would suddenly switch everything around, changing days and times of all the shows? Yeah, that would be really bad for us.