Blogging about life in Minnesota, raising our six kids with Down syndrome while battling Breast Cancer.

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the devil says, "Oh shit! She's up!"

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Sometimes I Forget

Most people know I'm a pretty forgetful person. I know that there are certain family members who get quite annoyed with my forgetfulness. Now, there are some things I NEVER forget. For example, I NEVER forget to give Angela her medication. EVER! This is because my survival depends on those little pills. I also NEVER forget to eat. Nope, my belly reminds me every hour, on the hour. I also never forget to let the dogs outside. Well, hard to forget when they're dancing in front of me with their legs crossed.

I happen to think there are two kinds of forgetfulness. The first kind is that total spaciness kind. You know..."Oh...I FORGOT there was a mountain of laundry in the basement and you needed clean underwear and socks."...or..."Crap, I FORGOT to plan dinner and here it is 5:30."

The other kind of forgetfulness is the kind that God creates. There are some things He wants you to forget about so that you can see things as they really are. Here are some things that I often forget about:

I Forget....

I forget that God is in control. No matter what, I do not get to be the boss of all things. God allows me to forget this so that I can fall on my face and allow Him to pick me back up again and let me give it another shot.

I forget that when I am in the midst of crisis, God is still here with me. Jesus sits next to me holding my hand through all of it. But just like when I fall and God picks me up, sometimes I feel Jesus give my hand a squeeze to remind me that I'm not alone in my fight.

I forget that Angela has Down Syndrome and sometimes that means she needs a little more time to do things. This makes me slow my life down a little bit, which is truly a blessing.

I forget that Angela has Down Syndrome. When she looks at me with her big brown eyes and asks, "Does your arm? Do you want a pillow?" all I see is a loving, compassionate little girl.

I forget that Angela has Down Syndrome. To me she is a vibrant, happy, almost 12 year old girl who's starting to notice boys, and likes to call friends on the phone.

But sometimes I forget the other way, and need to be reminded that Angela is just like every other 12 year old girl. Tonight as I watched her with her theater group I saw her do something she's never done before. She stood alone on the front of the entire group...and said the first few lines of her monologue (the only ones she has memorized so far) and when she came off the stage she said to me. "I'm crying." I looked at her face, and sure enough...there were tears there. What Angela was telling me (that most girls her age would try to hide) was that she was very nervous about being put on the spot, but that when she was done, she was SO PROUD of herself (and so relieved to be done) that it brought tears to her eyes.

I'm so thankful that God allows me to forget, because the reminders he gives me are life-changing.

1 comment:

Mommy to those Special Ks said...

GREAT post Leah! And so, so true! I'm glad to forget sometimes too!