Blogging about life in Minnesota, raising our five kids with Down syndrome while battling Breast Cancer.

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the devil says, "Oh shit! She's up!"

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

A Mother's Second Worst Nightmare

We all know what a mother's worst nightmare is, right? The death of a child of course. What's the second worst?

(Ring ring....ring ring)
The mom: Hello?
Son #2: Hi Mom! What'up?
The mom: Not much. Just getting some stuff picked up. What's new with you?
Son #2: Oh nuthin. Just work'in. Are you by the computer?
The Mom: No, why?
Son #2: There's a picure of (insert name of son #1 here) online.
The mom: Where online?
Son #2: Take a guess!
The mom: (trying not to sound irritated.) The newspaper?
Son #2: No, even better.
The mom: I don't want to know and I don't want to look. Where is it?
Son #2: The county jail inmate page.

This is a real conversation between a mother and one of her sons. I can tell you that when the mother pulled up the mug shots of her son, her heart sank to her toes. She cried. She swore. As the glassy, chemically affected eyes of her 20 year old son in a mug shot stared back at her via the computer screen, she cried out to God....

She asked God "How do I help him when he won't even speak to me? I know you love him more than I do. Please, what are you trying to teach him? Please tell me there's a good purpose to it in the end! Why do you allow him to continue on this way, following a path of certain destruction? Can't you put up bigger, stronger, more obvious road blocks for him? Please God, give me back my little boy. The giggle of the toddler he once was. The laughter of the 5 year old playing with his puppy. The shy grin of the 13 year old with is first crush. I want him back. His family wants him back. Satan, GET AWAY FROM HIM!!!!! Please Lord...BRING HIM BACK!"

If you wouldn't mind, I know a mom that would appreciate all the prayer her son can get right now. He needs warriors.

2 comments:

Megan's got 47 said...

Leah I am so sorry, wish there was something other than prayers that I could give. Please know although you might not understand it, God does have a plan and I am sure that things will get better for son#1.
HUGS to you.

heather said...

Leah, I am praying.