A Mother's Job

Now that I have kids out of the house, I'm trying to figure out where my job as "mom" ends. Where I have to step back and just watch the mistakes my kids make and let them learn on their own, and where I should step in.

I look at my grown kids and wonder if I did a good job with all that we went through. I have to be honest, it's hard to tell. Clearly I made mistakes along the way, (we all do, right? RIGHT?) I just wonder which ones were preventable?

I can see that the basic thing is still there....they both have good hearts. They don't like seeing someone hurting, and they don't like to cause hurt. This is a good thing, I just wish those same hearts were open to God. For that I'll keep praying.

One is hard working, the other expends alot of energy avoiding hard work. I look back to what I was doing at my 20th birthday. I had already been in the Army, gotten married, and had a two week old baby, and by my 21st birthday my husband and I had a house and another baby on the way. I think I'm glad my boys are nowhere near doing those things, but at the same time I wish they at least SEEMED ready to handle that level of responsibility. Should the unexpected happen I don't think either of them have the skills necessary to deal with it.

It was tough to be a young mom who barely knew myself, much less trying to get to know a husband and new babies at the same time. It was tougher still to become a single mother by the age of 23. I don't even want to see my grandchildren go through what my little boys did, so I will pray that my boys can straighten out their lives and become responsible, productive members of society.

If you are a person who prays, I would sure appreciate it if, the next time you sit down to have a talk with Him, you'd lift my son Noah up to Him as well. He needs all the prayers he can get right now. Pray for guidance for me. When to step back, when to step in. Pray for open hearts and minds all around, and for forgiveness on all the levels it's needed.