Monday, December 03, 2012

Two years ago...

Two years ago today, I put on a brave face and walked into Axel's foster home. His foster mother was not there that day. I know it was because she couldn't stand to be there when he left.

We played for just a few minutes when someone asked if we were ready. I removed the clothes I'd brought from the bag and handed them to one of the family members. As she dressed Axel she wiped tears off her cheek.

While I was having a hard time with the emotions behind all of this, I was also taking mental notes of Axel's behavior. All the times he kicked her, pulled her hair, spit at her. Behavior that I hadn't seen during the previous two visits. I also noted that nobody seemed surprised by his behavior, nor did anyone tell him to stop. I was starting to worry just a tiny bit!

At 10 years old Axel was drowning in the size 6 pants that were 5 inches too long! For weeks I had imagined him in the brand new jacket I brought along and now the time was finally here!  I handed it over. He was SO excited about all the new clothes! You could see he felt very grown up.

It was time to go. It was all I could do to hold myself together. Axel walked out the door ahead of me, holding the hand of his foster father. Someone  had told him he was going for a ride in the car and he was very excited. He was getting into a car with a woman who talked crazy talk gibberish (which must have been what English sounded like to him!) He had no idea...no idea I was taking him away forever.

The rest of that day was very difficult. Very. Difficult. You can read about it here. 

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