What I Wish You Knew

You. Yeah, you in the store check out line. Not him, you. I'd love to talk to you right now. I can see by your long stares you have questions. You're trying to figure us out. I wish we could stop life right here so I could tell you our story.

I want to tell you that you don't need to feel sorry for me. Our children are beautiful and we love every single extra chromosome that resides in every cell of their body. I know it's hard for you to believe, but some of them were chosen because of it.

Our life is not hard. Really, it's not. And to be honest, if you asked me which of the kids is the most challenging to raise, I would say the biological one. And no, I won't tell you which one that is. (Look close, you can probably figure it out!)

No, we are not saints. We aren't miracle workers either. I just walked into a building one day and we both knew right then we had to do something.

Why do we do it? I can probably give you 100 reasons. Instead I prefer to ask "Why wouldn't we?" You'll have trouble coming up with any, and the ones you do come up with might fit YOUR family, but they won't fit mine. "The benefits outweigh the risks" applies to us.

Hey you. Yes you...I saw you watching us. I saw you do a double take. I even saw you peer around the end of the isle at us. I recognized your looks. I used to do it too! When my oldest with Down syndrome was a baby, if I saw a family who had a child with DS I would stalk follow them.  But Angela didn't look like she had DS, or if she wasn't with me, it was hard to know how to start a conversation. But yes, I saw you. And yes, I recognized your attempt to go unnoticed. I want to tell you, you're gonna be ok! Your baby is just that...just a baby. Love that baby because before you know it you'll be me, walking through Target discussing boyfriends with your teenager. And yes, you'll get there. You'll survive this time in your life.

Our house is no different than anyone else's. If we need more of anything it's a better sense of humor than most parents because you have to be able to laugh (sometimes only in your head) at some of the things that are said and done around here. Who else has rules like, "No invisible people allowed upstairs." or "No dangling in the living room." And I really don't know anyone else who says, "Tongue in." as much as I do on any given day.

I wish you could join us at our house. You just might leave realizing your life priorities have changed.